Merry Correa. Merry Life. Merry Story.
April 23, 2019
I don’t know how to begin but let me tell you that it pains me to see someone who loves you deeply, be hurt because of my actions.
Let me tell you a story.
I have a crush. He’s a cell leader, choleric in temperament, friendly and anointed. I treated him as my kuya since he usually goes out with my older brother and i'm used to being treated their bunso. Fast forward 2019, I can’t remember what happened but he started talking to me not as a little sister, the gap eventually faded and we talk as if we’re really friends. It began with him responding to almost all of my instagram stories then we eventually started chatting through facebook messenger almost everyday. I will be honest, ofcourse, I like him, I’ll respond to him and the more time I spend to chat with him, the greater I appreciate him as a person. It was actually just this week when I realized that we have a connection- well not romantically but I know that we really get along well. Now what makes this story significant? Although, I am not in a relationship yet, I know that I am somewhat committed.
When he asked me if I was talking to this guy, I cannot not tell him and his response made me realize how heavy is it to love truly. His reply made me realize that despite the presence of the other guy in my life and the truth that I like this guy, he chose to trust the choices I will make and that he hopes that I will do the right thing.
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Now I realize how difficult is it to write “I chase love”. It’s making sense to me now that love is an adventure. It is something you have to figure out, understand and experience and when you eventually find it, you have to do everything to keep it. Ang pagmamahal ay di lang pagpili ng taong mamahalin, eto rin ay pag pili na mahalin ang taong pinili mo araw-araw. Along the way, the kilig may fade, circumstances may come and will make you think that you made the wrong choice or that one day, you will just loose the excitement of choosing him. But true love isn’t just based on emotions. It is a battle we have to win everyday, a firm decision we have to make- a choice. To love truly is to choose Him over and over again.
The first entry, I was just sharing that if we will only understand the love of Jesus, we cannot not love Him but there will be times that our love for Him will be tested. We started with our christian life na super on fire for the Lord and we get so kilig with the experience we had on our first encounter with Him. But along the way, temptations make us think that there are so many options and struggles that make us think that the best way is to give up on our relationship with God. But if we truly understand His love for us and we know how much He loves us, despite the days that we feel like there are “happier” options, we will still choose Him because we understand who He is in our lives.
We know that Jesus gave His own life for us because He loved us kahit na alam niya yung past natin. He chose to continually love us kahit na He saw this day coming na maiisip nating tumingin sa mga bagay na magpapasaya satin temporarily. Well, honestly, these things are not really bad options. It’s just that if we choose these temporary people or moments, we will lose the greater life and promise in stored for us. Ending? Masasaktan ka lang and the worst part is, when we choose to take a taste of these temporary things, we hurt the one who loves us truly.
Kung tunay kang nagmamahal, hindi mo kayang makitang nasasaktan ang mahal mo ng dahil sa mga pagkakamali mo. That’s why we have to fight our battle. We have to decide to choose love despite all circumstances. We have to strive to protect the people we love and make sure they will experience the love that they deserve.
Kailangan natin ipaglaban ang pagmamahal natin kay Jesus. After all it’s the best love for us. A love that is unconditional. Ang tunay na nagmamahal ay yung nagmamahal na lumalaban, hindi bumibitaw. Remembering my situation, I came to realize that I can meet a million people and be happy for a moment, but I will not be able to find someone who will love me the way that Jesus loves me.
Love always protects, always trusts, always perseveres.
After all, love never fails.
If it fails, it isn’t love.